I remember / je me souviens
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For those limbic bursts of nostalgia, invented by Proust, miniaturized by Nicholson Baker, and freeze-dried by Joe Brainard in his I remember and by Georges Perec in his Je me souviens.

But there are no fractions, the world is an integer
Like us, and like us it can neither stand wholly apart nor disappear.
When one is young it seems like a very strange and safe place,
But now that I have changed it feels merely odd, cold
And full of interest.
          --John Ashbery, "A Wave"

Sometimes I sense that to put real confidence in my memory I have to get to the end of all rememberings. That seems to say that I forego remembering. And now that strikes me as an accurate description of what it is to have confidence in one's memory.
          --Stanley Cavell, The Claim of Reason


Monday, November 27, 2006
I remember my parents' umbrellas in the hallway outside our door, where they would leave them open to dry out when it was raining. This was another sign of their competence -- a sign of their competence because the umbrellas with their air of self-possession, the serene reasonableness they projected in just being open, on the floor, inside, leaning inscrutably on their own ribs, not protecting anyone, seemed just like my parents themselves, knowing more about what was appropriate than I could have guessed. They clustered around the door; sometimes my grandparents' umbrellas were there too, and they would present a tableau like the kind of all-adult conversation that they would all sometimes have when they came over. Umbrellas were like coffee and showers to me, something part of adult life to which I was not yet initiated. I had to wear galoshes (especially with desert boots!) and a raincoat. So the umbrellas clustered together, studiously presenting their backs to me, seemed very mysteriously knowing in their adult opacity, and that opacity was their very nature, designed as they were to block and deflect. (I think for this reason I was always shocked by broken, wind-capsized umbrellas when I saw them on the street.)


posted by william 7:09 AM
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